Female Sex Offenders – comment and response

We had a comment recently and I thought I would post it here along with the response to the comment:

Janie on said:

So female sex offenders is actually a topic I enjoy researching as well as female serial killers; however following this site, I feel there are things taken out of proportion, bias and unclear on here. The articles about the teachers and students. Those relationships were consensual among both parties, with the so called victim being way past puberty and sometimes at the age of consent. What makes it sexual abuse…the age difference? That isn’t enough to call for sexual abuse. In the bible, Mary was 14 when she got pregnant and married Joseph.

For one thing it is a power differential.  Don’t forget the laws that are in place in regards to this.  And if you truly are “researching” the issue you should have already come across a number of victim statements, postings, comments, etc. that very clearly demonstrate the harm that can occur even if they are past puberty.  I could go on but I am sure there will be others reading this that will want to add more.

There are cultures where it’s okay for a mother to soothe her child by rubbing the genital area. If no harm is being done, then what makes it abuse which can also relate to female to male abuse.

There are cultures where slavery was legal too.  Didn’t make right.  Plus how do you know if harm is being done or not?  Don’t forget the little tiny thing called consent.

If he’s enjoying it and having a good time regardless of age, how is it abuse?

This piece tells me that you probably are not truly researching or if so not in a truly objective manner.  By your statement here nothing should be considered abusive if the victim is enjoying it.  Young victims may not even know that they are being abused until they are older and the fact that part of what happened might feel good is often a part of the damage done to the victim.  By your logic it is acceptable for a 40 year old to do whatever they want to a 4 year old as long as they enjoy it.  That is not only wrong but basically the way many pedophiles try to rationalize and justify their actions.  How can a young person give consent?

I say regardless of age because in the elementary and middle school I was going to, kids were having sex with each other. Girls got pregnant yet they were all under the age of 14, so was it rape for all those involved though it was consensual? Five boys got caught giving oral sex to one another in the bathroom during recess. If children can consent to sex with one another then why not with adults? That’s my stance on the age difference.

There is a difference between young children doing normal sexual exploring and adults who clearly take advantage of and abuse children.  Again this is the mindset of many child sex offenders.  Children are not consenting until the law states they are at the age of consent.

I feel a lot of articles if not most, on here are ‘he said, she said’. I have yet to come across an article that had literal proof that rape, or a sex abuse act occurred. That’s why it’s hard to prove male to female rape if there’s no evidence and female to female, because all it is is ‘he said, she said’.Whose to say some of these aren’t false accusations, or wanting to jump on the ‘female sex offender’ bandwagon in hopes of getting a Lifetime Movie made after them? Human beings can be evil and calculating like that. Some could argue that there are witnesses. Well witnesses aren’t reliable. If you sat 20 people down in a room and had them watch a movie then when the movie was over, took them each out individually and asked what happened, described what happen, all 20 would recount something different.

You just haven’t looked or you would have found cases with physical proof.  For example ones in which they were filmed.  And while false accusations occur they are still rare.  Your comments and logic about witnesses means we should never use them for anything right?  Wrong.

I think this site needs more evidence in regards to physical evidence; if physical evidence can be found in semen from men then physical evidence can be found from women, science just isn’t there yet. Until then, a lot of this stuff to me is just he said, she said.

This site is about raising awareness.  As such we publish all research studies we can find on the subject and the occasional story.  You just didn’t look enough or you would find cases with physical evidence.

The creator of this site should also be realistic, yes, y’all want equal victim treatment of male and female sex offenders. Well, we live in a world where women are second class citizens. Until women are no longer second class citizens then you will see a difference on how female sex crimes are handle. And then when a woman is found guilty for sex offending, her sentence is more harsher than a male offender. Why is that?

Wrong again.  If you look at the research on average the sentences are less harsh for female sex offenders not more harsh.  As for being equal, equality means being equal in all ways, good and bad.  And for the record I don’t like the use of “equality” I think fairness is a much better term.  All people should be treated fairly.  There are no “equals”, we are all unique individuals and should be treated as such.  For example whoever is most qualified for a job should be the one who gets the job period.

This site also lacks female sex crimes between parties who are adults. This is implying that women can’t rape adult women nor males which I’m sure you don’t want. The main focus on this site is women and children which is great, but you’re still cutting off a community that might be there.

This very much shows me that you didn’t even try to find that piece on the site.  Just look at the popular posts listing and you see one titled “Adult Male Victims of Female Sex Offenders.”  And there are others on here such as “An interview with Lucy: A survivor of woman to woman rape.”  So I suspect you only looked for what you wanted to find and ignored anything that goes against your beliefs.

Yep, just my thoughts on the site and female offenders. Also I’m currently reading a book called Female Sex Offenders by Juila Hislop, Ph. D.

That is nice.  I hope it helps.  There is a ton of things that I could have written in response to some of your comments.  I am hoping by my leaving out some things that this will allow others to comment and take part in the discussion if they so desire.  With that said I almost did not approve your comment because it basically is just a poor crude attempt at saying sexually abusing children is acceptable.  I finally decided to allow the comment to go through because it helps for others to see that this kind of thinking is out there and these are some of the excuses made for sexually abusing children.

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4 thoughts on “Female Sex Offenders – comment and response

  1. A calm, collected and professional response to such a troubling comment. Well done for holding your nerve in response. I find it particularly distributing that Janie’s claims to ‘enjoy’ researching the topic of female sex offenders as well as female serial killers as if researching (or fantasizing) about the rape, torture, sexual abuse and murder of children by women is nothing more than a ‘harmless’ pastime (or fantasy). Whom, in the right mind, actually ‘enjoys’ researching about female sex offenders/female serial killers when, quite understandably, most right-minded people find the rape & sexual abuse of children by men or women to be totally abhorrent and complete unacceptable?

  2. I’m quite at awe my comment was feature on the home page; I’m truly grateful.

    And who’s to say I’m not in my right mind? We all have hobbies; we all have our types of comics we like to read, the types of movies we like to watch. The fact that I love reading and studying about serial killers, rapists, and molesters is no different than people loving to go see movies like Saw, and The Human Centipede. Just because my hobbies are a bit darker than yours doesn’t mean I’m not in my right mind. We are all unique individuals after all. =)

  3. It’s not the topic its the views you put forth on the topic that shed light on your thinking.

  4. Janie wrote: “The articles about the teachers and students. Those relationships were consensual among both parties, with the so called victim being way past puberty and sometimes at the age of consent. What makes it sexual abuse…the age difference? That isn’t enough to call for sexual abuse. In the bible, Mary was 14 when she got pregnant and married Joseph.”

    4.3. GENDERED DISCOURSE

    The participants’ use of rationalising discourse was partly based on gendered notions of the male aggressor and the female victim. The active male and passive female were further reinforced in descriptions of the offences. These gendered constructions ensured that the offenders‟ roles in their crimes remained passive and as such these discursive constructions functioned to uphold the impossibility of female sexual perpetration. These findings align with Denov‟s (2003)
    findings that traditional gender roles function to uphold myths concerning female sexual perpetration.

    Janie wrote: “There are cultures where it’s okay for a mother to soothe her child by rubbing the genital area. If no harm is being done, then what makes it abuse which can also relate to female to male abuse.”

    4.3.2. MATERNAL DISCOURSE

    Most of the participants’ perpetrations involved offences against their own children. However, these offences were discursively renegotiated so that the narratives of the crimes centred on the participant as a protective and caring mother. The participants thus not only upheld their subjective innocence but also problematised themselves as criminals by producing themselves as the protector rather than as the perpetrator.

    Janie wrote: “The creator of this site should also be realistic, yes, y’all want equal victim treatment of male and female sex offenders. Well, we live in a world where women are second class citizens. Until women are no longer second class citizens then you will see a difference on how female sex crimes are handle. And then when a woman is found guilty for sex offending, her sentence is more harsher than a male offender. Why is that?”

    4.4. MORALITY DISCOURSE

    Women are socially constructed as moralistic, law-abiding, conservative, virtuous and honest (Naffine, 1987). The participants drew on discursive coordinates such as these in order to amplify their femininity. As indicated by Bourke (2007), the social construction of femininity implies goodness and purity. Moreover, exceptions to this construction are considered to be deviant. The participants’ use of morality discourse thus allowed them to avoid being associated with deviance.

    4.5. PERCEPTIONS OF THE LEGAL AND CORRECTIONAL SYSTEMS

    The participants’ constructed their perceptions of the legal and correctional systems in a way that allowed them to uphold their subjective innocence and to continue to resist confession. They expressed anger towards the legal system and often stated that their incarcerations were unfair.

    Discourse and power in the self-perceptions of incarcerated South African female sexual offenders by Sherianne Kramer

    http://www.academia.edu/1253935/Discourse_and_power_in_the_self-perceptions_of_incarcerated_South_African_female_sexual_offenders

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